‘Reverse Engineering would
be a good match report title,’ I thought, as Romelu Lukaku beat Joe Hart to
send Everton into an early lead which Manuel ‘The Engineer’ Pellegrini surely
wouldn’t have planned for. Sadly though, before I’d so much as considered how I’d
explain the joke without labouring and ruining it, the home team had equalised through
one-time Everton phony bid subject Alvaro Negredo.
To the Blues’ credit, they
took the disappointment of conceding barely a minute after scoring in their
stride, and spent the rest of the first half trading chances with their wealthy
hosts in a manner we weren’t really used to seeing from a team which would
often look to keep things as tight as possible away from home under the
previous manager.
Lukaku had a legitimate
penalty appeal turned down by ‘referee’ John Moss after being shoved to the
ground, while at the other end Sergio Aguero fluffed his lines on two occasions
when faced with the intimidating sight of Tim Howard and his new Al Qaeda beard.
The Argentine did, however, find the courage to beat Guantanamo’s no.1 on the
stroke of half time, as he received David Silva’s through ball on the turn, put
a yard between himself and Sylvain Distin and found the inside of the far post
to make it 2-1.
Despite the setback there
was still a feeling that Everton remained very much in the game and could quite
conceivably find an equaliser of their own after the restart, but as was the
case against Newcastle last Monday, Roberto Martinez’s team appeared incapable
of finding a second wind and pushing the pace again following a strong opening
stanza.
Recognising that his side
had lost its ability to threaten on the counter, Martinez replaced the
ineffective Kevin Mirallas and tiring Leon Osman with Gerard Deulofeu and the almost-mythical
Darron Gibson, but the game was over as a contest before either substitute had
a chance to make an impact.
Barely five minutes after
the changes were made Seamus Coleman sent Pablo Zabaleta tumbling with football’s
equivalent of the ‘ghost punch’ which Muhammad Ali hit Sonny Liston with. Moss
reacted exactly how you’d expect after listening to Neil Warnock’s withering
half time comments from the Starship BT Sport, and Aguero’s penalty found its
way into the net via Howard’s hand, post and head.
That was pretty much it
for the Super Blues, as for all their outstanding talent, Lukaku and Ross Barkley
are still just 20 and 19 respectively, and are simply not able to go full pelt
in the Premier League without running out of steam after an hour or so. That
showed once again at the Etihad, as the ball gradually stopped sticking up
front and the defence found themselves under more and more pressure in the
closing stages.
Everton clearly missed the
ineligible Gareth Barry, who might have been able to do something about his
former teammates carving through midfield with relative ease as the game wore
on, but even if everyone’s favourite loanee had been able to feature it would
have still been a tough afternoon against players as good as Silva, Aguero and
Yaya Toure.
One particular plus point,
though, was the performance of James McCarthy, who brings the sort of energy
and enthusiasm that Everton’s midfield has lacked for some time. If the Ireland
international can add an eye for a forward pass to his arsenal then the £13m
that old Whealan Dealin’ insisted Everton cough up for him won’t seem quite so
steep.
Hopefully the
international break will give Martinez and his players enough time to come to
terms with the fact that their wait for an unbeaten season will go on for at
least another year, and they’ll bounce back in spectacular fashion when fat
head Steve Bruce turns up with his newly promoted Tigers a week on Saturday.
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